Monthly Archives: June 2011

Slave camps?


Sorry for being so…. not here…. heh.
So, funny thing happened at work last night. I was on the sales floor, folding some shirts and chatting briefly with some guys about said shirts.

Kid: Do you have *random thing I didn’t recognize* shirts?
Me: Eh? What?
Kid: *repeats*
Me: I have no idea what that is, so I’m gonna say no. But what is it, I might be able to tell you where to get it?
Kid: It’s slash metal (or something).
Me: Yeah…… we don’t have stuff like that.
Kid: But you have Metallica.
Me: Yeah, but everyone knows who Metallica is…. Look, most of our shirts are classic rock. And, ya know, rappers…..
Kid: You shouldn’t sell rapper shirts.
Me: Hey, they sell. 16 year olds want to marry Li’l Wayne…. for some reason… even though he’s been to jail…
Kid: And Lady Gaga shirts?
Me: Yeah….. so? Her music is catchy.
Kid: She’s part of the illuminati.
Me: Lolwut?
Kid: She’s part of the illuminati.
Me: And that would be…. what?
Kid: Basically a government conspiracy.
Me: Lady Gaga is not part of a government conspiracy.
Kid: Keep saying that when you’re working for George W Bush in a slave camp! *walks out*
Me: Yeah. not gonna happen, dude.


Carla the Redneck Juliet


So, my boyfriend and I were in the car the other day, and he got a random text.

Girl: Hi.
BF: Hi. Who is this?
Girl: Carla. Who is this?
BF: *name*
Girl: Oh, sorry, wrong number. I was looking for *other name*
BF: I don’t know anyone by that name.
Girl: Sorry to bother you, then.
*few minutes pass*
Girl: Can I ask you something?
BF: Sure.
Girl: Are you single?

At this point, I’m kinda confused. When she asked if she could ask him something, I knew where it was headed.

BF: My girlfriend who is sitting in the car next to me says “no.”

Her signature in her texts is “*Redneck Juliet*” so we about died laughing.