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c76.Fishbulb: lol hi
c76.Fishbulb: so
c76.Fishbulb: I cant even tell
c76.Fishbulb: if that was a troll or not
c76.Fishbulb: please enlighten me
c76.Fishbulb: lmfao
The Nautilus of Doom: like. o.m.g. whats a troll?
The Nautilus of Doom: is it like the thing under the bridge?
c76.Fishbulb: liek omg
c76.Fishbulb: yes
c76.Fishbulb: exactly.
The Nautilus of Doom: y wud i b a troll? im totes adorbz
c76.Fishbulb: liek totes zomg
The Nautilus of Doom: riiiiight?
The Nautilus of Doom: so like. y did you friend me?
The Nautilus of Doom: thats super weird
c76.Fishbulb: because
c76.Fishbulb: gotta know if troll or not
The Nautilus of Doom: yes. yes I am.
c76.Fishbulb: clearly a troll bt
The Nautilus of Doom: honest to god.
c76.Fishbulb: that was fucking awesome
c76.Fishbulb: to maintain that for like a full hour
c76.Fishbulb: im proud of you
The Nautilus of Doom: I’m from California, and I can talk like that, but I nearly kill myself.
The Nautilus of Doom: I grew up in So Cal.
c76.Fishbulb: bahahahaaaa
c76.Fishbulb: yeah I was impressed
The Nautilus of Doom: ps. Jinx helped me keep it up.
The Nautilus of Doom: impressive for someone in Canada.
c76.Fishbulb: I tried but couldnt even do it for like a minute
c76.Fishbulb: LMFAO! xD epic.
c76.Fishbulb: you guys are my new heroes.
The Nautilus of Doom: awesome!

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Aside

Adam Lanza’s Demon: you can be my little submissive girl now
The Nautilus of Doom: oh yes. oh yes.
The Nautilus of Doom: I love it when you’re an asshole.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: don’t pretend like you don’t like it
Adam Lanza’s Demon: we just dominated the fuck outta your team
The Nautilus of Doom: and I care why?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: and it was… good for me
Adam Lanza’s Demon: because, I’ve dated english majors like you
Adam Lanza’s Demon: they are fine little things
The Nautilus of Doom: well I’m glad you validate yourself by winning in a video game.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: it’s better than losing, am I wrong?
The Nautilus of Doom: winning is nice. but I am not a sporty person, so I don’t really know much about winning.
The Nautilus of Doom: English majors aren’t good at sports. or math.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: haha, you don’t know much about winning?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: doesn’t surprise me
Adam Lanza’s Demon: you live in NC, right?
The Nautilus of Doom: nope
Adam Lanza’s Demon: what state?
The Nautilus of Doom: TN
Adam Lanza’s Demon: that’s even worse
The Nautilus of Doom: hey. rent is cheap.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: so are the people though
The Nautilus of Doom: true. true. but I’m not from here, so it’s w/e
Adam Lanza’s Demon: where are you from, So Cal?
The Nautilus of Doom: Ventura.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: a dirty dirty place
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I am from the much nicer, San Diego
The Nautilus of Doom: but much more expensive
Adam Lanza’s Demon: yeah, but I’m rich, so it’s alright
The Nautilus of Doom: oh. you’re gonna be my rich sugar daddy? I need that so much
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I will be take you to pound town every night
Adam Lanza’s Demon: and buy you very little
The Nautilus of Doom: so. you call me fat, and then say you’ll be my sugar dadd.
The Nautilus of Doom: daddy*
The Nautilus of Doom: awesome.
The Nautilus of Doom: ’cause I have daddy issues
Adam Lanza’s Demon: yeah, you’re lucky that I like those kind of girls
Adam Lanza’s Demon: oh god, just reading those words, made me kind of hard
The Nautilus of Doom: good to know.
The Nautilus of Doom: well. my dad died when I was a teenager, leaving me sad, alone, and afraid of commitment. I fucked every guy in my high school and had a couple of abortions
The Nautilus of Doom: so it’s kind of a train wreck down there.
The Nautilus of Doom: I’m saving up money to get reconstructive surgery
The Nautilus of Doom: can you pay for that?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: it depends what it’s for
The Nautilus of Doom: otherwise, it’ll be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway
The Nautilus of Doom: my pussy is so stretched out right now.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’m sure your butthole still works though
The Nautilus of Doom: oh. no. it’s fucked too.
The Nautilus of Doom: I started with that.
The Nautilus of Doom: I didn’t have vaginal sex until I was a sophomore
Adam Lanza’s Demon: if I pay for your surgery, it’ll be like I popped your cherry
The Nautilus of Doom: awesome.
The Nautilus of Doom: I need a guy like you in my life.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I don’t really want to pay
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’d rather just fuck you
The Nautilus of Doom: it’s ok. pay for the surgery, have your fun, and you can be my pimp.
The Nautilus of Doom: just pay me in beer. you can have the rest.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’ll pay you in my dick spit
Adam Lanza’s Demon: send me your naked pictures
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I want to jack off to you
The Nautilus of Doom: lemme find one. hold on.
The Nautilus of Doom: my crappy cheap internet I’m stealing from the neighbors is giving me trouble. hold on.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’m waiting
The Nautilus of Doom: I can’t access my private pictures on facebook that I reserve for this kind of situation. my internet freaked out.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: gonna do that to me now?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: not surprised
The Nautilus of Doom: it’s not my fault I can’t afford cable internet.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’m sure my thick cock would still take care of your loose puss
The Nautilus of Doom: I dunno. it’s pretty loose.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’ve been told that my dick is exceptionally thick
Adam Lanza’s Demon: and I would fuck the caylights out of you
The Nautilus of Doom: caylights?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: daylights
Adam Lanza’s Demon: see, you correct mistakes when they’re not yours
The Nautilus of Doom: ??
Adam Lanza’s Demon: take a picture of your pussy with your phone
Adam Lanza’s Demon: and text it to me
The Nautilus of Doom: I don’t have a camera phone.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: oh what?
The Nautilus of Doom: http://www.girlsgames4kids.com/pictures/Fat%20Girls/Fat_Girls_fat.jpg
Adam Lanza’s Demon: what are you living in 1995?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: lol that’s not you
The Nautilus of Doom: says you!
The Nautilus of Doom: got silent now because you know the truth?
The Nautilus of Doom: I’m a fat, lonely English major with nothing better to do than suck at video games?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I just came
The Nautilus of Doom: even  better
Adam Lanza’s Demon: but it was to actual porn
Adam Lanza’s Demon: not some googled imaged of a fat girkl
The Nautilus of Doom: you think I’d seriously send some stranger a nude?
The Nautilus of Doom: to a troll?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: that wasn’t a nude
The Nautilus of Doom: well. still. you think I’d send a real photo of myself anywhere NEAR nude to some stranger troll on the internet?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I want more as proof
Adam Lanza’s Demon: how many dicks have you taken?
The Nautilus of Doom: 3
The Nautilus of Doom: if you want the honest truth.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: how has that stretched your pussy out?
The Nautilus of Doom: you believed all that? awesome.
The Nautilus of Doom: I keep forgetting that sarcasm doesn’t read well online
Adam Lanza’s Demon: so you’re saying that you’re not really 600 pounds?
The Nautilus of Doom: never said I was.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: it says a lot about your personality that I believed you though
The Nautilus of Doom: like I care. I’m keeping this up because I’m drunk.
The Nautilus of Doom: because, yes, truthfully, I have nothing better to do tonight than get drunk and play video games.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: and you want my penis in your pussy
The Nautilus of Doom: nope.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: in your mouth
The Nautilus of Doom: you think every female wants your dick, because none of them actually do.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: that makes absolutely no sense
Adam Lanza’s Demon: Women like me because I’m charming, polite, and rich
The Nautilus of Doom: you think girls feel threatened by you. you think they wont approach you because you’re too awesome or some shit.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: you know, you should have been a psychology major with that stupid-ass psychoanalysis.
The Nautilus of Doom: I’m not a psych major. I’m an english major. I majoed in BS.
The Nautilus of Doom: and I’m ok with it
Adam Lanza’s Demon: What year are you? Aka, how many years left until you can’t find a proper job?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: Let me guess, you’re going to go to law school, because you don’t know of whate else to do
The Nautilus of Doom: in all honesty, I’m a 5th year senior because I had a mental breakdown when I decided I didn’t wanna teach. so, I switched minors and I’m going to finish within a year, probably.
The Nautilus of Doom: I’m going for a Technical writing degree.
The Nautilus of Doom: and if that doesn’t work out, fuck it. I’ll do what I can with what I have and, heaven forbid, I go back to school and get a teaching degre.
The Nautilus of Doom: degree*
The Nautilus of Doom: but, considering technical writing is a field not a lot of people know about but a lot of companies actually need, I think I’ll be ok.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: wth is a technical writing degree?
The Nautilus of Doom: look it up.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: pass
The Nautilus of Doom: then don’t judge.
The Nautilus of Doom: I’m telling you the truth about my plans for life because I’m not ashamed of them
Adam Lanza’s Demon: any major that involves simply learning the language that the majority in this country speaks can’t be worth that much
The Nautilus of Doom: it has NOTHING to do with the languag.e
The Nautilus of Doom: it’s about the literature, the usage, the importance, etc.
The Nautilus of Doom: technical writing involves using the mastery of the English language to create useful documents for companies. manuals, proposals, websites, etc.
The Nautilus of Doom: English courses in colleges do not teach you how to speak or write words. they teach you how to write ABOUT things. how to think critically. how to analyze things.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: if you ask me, it sounds like you drank the marketing kool-aid that your college provided for the major
The Nautilus of Doom: nope. if I listened to the college, I’d still be in education courses, wanting to teach dipshit teenagers the differences between “they’re” “their,” and “there”
The Nautilus of Doom: what are you trying to accomplish by telling me my major is crap? for telling me my education is worthless?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’m trying to help you
The Nautilus of Doom: funny
Adam Lanza’s Demon: Do you know how ridiculous the job market is right now for grads?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I mean, not for me, of course
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I make 150k a year
The Nautilus of Doom: yes. this is why I am NOT going into education or medicine. everyone is doing that. every. one.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: but for you, it will be very, very bad
The Nautilus of Doom: I already told you. most companies need technical writers. most of them hire secretaries and make them do the work for less money but with nowhere NEAR the quality or expertise. job listings for these positions are plentiful.
The Nautilus of Doom: you’re just mad that you picked some career field you thought would help and now you have to lie to some stranger on the internet to feel better
Adam Lanza’s Demon: Oh, that is so far from the truth it’s funny
Adam Lanza’s Demon: in fact, I am in the top 2% of the country
Adam Lanza’s Demon: and I’m only 25
The Nautilus of Doom: good for you.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I went to Harvard
The Nautilus of Doom: so you’ve said.
The Nautilus of Doom: and you’re a stuck up ass about it.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’m simply telling you this because it pleases me to know
The Nautilus of Doom: good for you.
The Nautilus of Doom: I’m glad you’re happy in your life.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: yeah, thank you.
The Nautilus of Doom: I don’t care about what you do. but I’m glad it makes you happy. I like to know that people are pleased with their choices in life.
The Nautilus of Doom: unlike you. you want to put people down who don’t go in the field you do.
The Nautilus of Doom: and if everyone followed your advice, we’d all be fighting for the same jobs.
The Nautilus of Doom: and I now you’re going to say “but I’m the best, so no one will steal my job”
Adam Lanza’s Demon: no, but we’d have a lot more people that weren’t going to have an impossible time finding a decent job
Adam Lanza’s Demon: no, I’d think that people should do what they want, as long as it would provide them a good chance at finding a good job
The Nautilus of Doom: heaven forbid people fight in a job market to do something they ENJOY.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: why do the lonely girls always have the weiner dogs?
The Nautilus of Doom: because it’s not originally my dog.
The Nautilus of Doom: but they are sweet and loyal dogs.
The Nautilus of Doom: and why do you assume I’m lonely?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: because you’re talking to some guy that you just met online
The Nautilus of Doom: because I’m drunk and bored and have nothing better to do tonight because my boyfriend is watching football.
The Nautilus of Doom: ysoquiet all of a sudden?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: well, if you’re ever in Delaware, let me know, and I’ll show you what you’ve been missing with your boyfriend
The Nautilus of Doom: hah. nope.
The Nautilus of Doom: a) no plans on going to deleware and b) no plans on leaving my boyfriend
Adam Lanza’s Demon: oh, you wouldn’t have to leave him
The Nautilus of Doom: also, wouldn’t cheat.
The Nautilus of Doom: not that kind of girl
Adam Lanza’s Demon: what do you mean cheat?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I just said I’d show you what you were missing
Adam Lanza’s Demon: take you out to a nice show, and get some dinner
Adam Lanza’s Demon: that kind of thing…
Adam Lanza’s Demon: but kind of presumptive for you to assume
The Nautilus of Doom: yeah. I’d consider that cheating.
The Nautilus of Doom: and I prefer not to  hang out with douchebags.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: you love douchebags
Adam Lanza’s Demon: that’s why you’re still talking to me
The Nautilus of Doom: not to fuck or hang out with.
The Nautilus of Doom: drunk me likes talking to morons. it’s funny.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I am 1000x smarter than you
The Nautilus of Doom: well good for you
Adam Lanza’s Demon: that’s already been established
The Nautilus of Doom: doesn’t mean you’re not a moron
The Nautilus of Doom: and you decided that. I decided nothing
Adam Lanza’s Demon: once you get to know me, you’ll learn
The Nautilus of Doom: i have no intentions of getting to know you.
The Nautilus of Doom: I’ll sober up and go “well. that was a dumb idea.”
Adam Lanza’s Demon: most girls sober up and contemplate on why they didn’t do that sooner
The Nautilus of Doom: I might do that. then I’ll read the saved convo and go “that’s why. he’s a dick and I thought it was funny.”
The Nautilus of Doom: I work with the public. the public who think fart jokes and sex toys are funny.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: yep, you surround yourself with the lowest form of person
Adam Lanza’s Demon: the spencer’s gift patron
The Nautilus of Doom: exactly.
The Nautilus of Doom: they pay me and I get to work somewhere I can say shit like “clit massager” and no one gets offended. it’s entertaining
Adam Lanza’s Demon: my tongue has a clit massager on the end of it
The Nautilus of Doom: sounds like a medical condition.
The Nautilus of Doom: you might be having a stroke
Adam Lanza’s Demon: having a seizure, and getting you off at the same time
The Nautilus of Doom: because seizures are sexy.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: the rhythms of my tongue on your clit
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’m checking out your fbook pictures
The Nautilus of Doom: so?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: and I want to fuck you…
The Nautilus of Doom: good to know.
The Nautilus of Doom: but you can’t.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: just to let you know, you wouldn’t be able to resist
The Nautilus of Doom: no. I would.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: you’re the short-haired lesbian type
The Nautilus of Doom: my hair isn’t that short anymore
Adam Lanza’s Demon: you need a good dicking
The Nautilus of Doom: hasn’t been in years.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: you look like harry potter in the first movie
The Nautilus of Doom: and?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: Expeliosus
The Nautilus of Doom: spelled it wrong.
Adam Lanza’s Demon: wow
Adam Lanza’s Demon: your nerdery surprises me
The Nautilus of Doom: does it?
Adam Lanza’s Demon: after you graduate, apply to be my secretary
Adam Lanza’s Demon: at my law firm
Adam Lanza’s Demon: I’ll hire you
Adam Lanza’s Demon: it’s good pay
Adam Lanza’s Demon: but you’d have to put out
The Nautilus of Doom: tempting. but no
Adam Lanza’s Demon: alright, I grow tired
The Nautilus of Doom: fair enough.
The Nautilus of Doom: goodbye, asshole.